I’m forty-four in a week and I find myself asking the same question that countless other mid-lifers have asked themselves. How did I get here?
How did I get from being a young, happening TV reporter with a racy red coupé and a flat in oh-so-trendy Primrose Hill in London to a middle-aged mother of two adolescent boys in a suburban four-bed detached in Surrey?
What have I achieved, where am I going and have I got the energy to get there? And really, if I haven’t got there by now am I ever going to?
In the last five years I’ve written two novels that are available on Kindle, This Last Summer and Sweet Seduction. I’m battling through research for my third—a sequel to This Last Summer. It’s not coming easily—I’ve had to step away from the computer to an old fashioned notepad and pen to flesh out the time-line that’s so clear in my head. My head, however, is not available for download from Amazon so I need somehow to get it transferred from a bunch of neurons onto a computer screen.
Added to this, family life continues apace. School summer holidays are looming, as are school trips that need to be packed for, dogs that need to be walked, food that needs to be cooked and a husband who needs some attention (though he’s very patient).
On top of that, I’m struggling to come to terms with the fact that my little boys aren’t so little any more. One is bigger than me already and has banned me from writing anything about him on my blog, from using the acronym LOL (because I’m too old) and saying the word ‘cool’. Because if there is anything I clearly am not (to him) it is cool.
I often want to echo the words ‘Stop the world I want to get off’. Not permanently, just for a little beach time with a fruity drink and a good book and when I look down, I’d like to see my old, twenty-something body looking hot in a bikini, if you don’t mind.
And when I’m ready to resume life, I’d like to come back to a clean and tidy house, no piles of washing to be put away, homework done and the aroma of something delicious cooking in the oven. Oh yes, and twenty thousand words of my new work-in-progress exquisitely written and perfectly edited on my laptop. Well, it’s nearly my birthday… I can dream.
This Last Summer:
Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B004774N6E